I’ll admit it—I’ve had moments where I could’ve been a better listener. Like many founders, I was quick to jump in with my perspective, defend my decisions, or explain why something didn’t go as planned. I didn’t think I was uncoachable—I thought I was just being confident.
Then someone gave me advice that shifted everything: “Before you point the finger at someone else, point it at yourself.”
That hit home. It wasn’t about blame—it was about ownership. It made me realize that being coachable isn’t about agreeing with every piece of feedback; it’s about listening, processing, and adapting. That’s the foundation of growth—and of great leadership.
The Cost of Being Uncoachable
Uncoachable founders might think they’re showing confidence, but they’re actually sending the opposite message:
• They don’t listen. They cut people off or rush to respond.
• They make excuses. There’s always someone or something else to blame.
• They don’t execute. They dismiss good advice or fail to act on it.
These habits don’t just hurt your relationships with investors, mentors, or teams—they hurt your ability to grow as a leader.
Why Listening Is a Game-Changer
Most founders think talking faster, explaining more, or dominating the conversation makes them look confident. Spoiler: it doesn’t. It kills trust.
Take Steve Jobs, for example. He didn’t just talk; he mastered the art of listening and pacing. Jobs knew how to control a room—not by saying more, but by saying less.
He used silence to make his words land. He slowed down to build tension. He took time to absorb feedback and respond thoughtfully. And that skill? It didn’t just make him a great speaker—it made him a great leader.
Three Ways to Become Coachable
Coachability isn’t about being passive or losing your voice—it’s about sharpening it. Here are three shifts that can help you become the kind of founder people want to work with and invest in:
Use Silence Like a Power Move
You’re not a podcast. Stop trying to fill every second with words.
Instead:
• Pause for 3 seconds after sharing your value prop.
• Let key metrics linger before diving into details.
• Breathe between major transitions to signal control.
Silence says, “I’m confident enough to let this sit.” It’s a subtle but powerful way to own the room.
Lead with Questions, Not Answers
Curiosity is your best ally. Great leaders don’t just have answers—they ask the questions no one else is asking.
Instead:
• Start with a thought-provoking industry question.
• Reframe problems in a way that challenges assumptions.
• Let the tension build before sharing your solution.
Questions spark dialogue, and dialogue builds trust.
Point the Finger at Yourself First
This one’s personal for me. Accountability isn’t about blame—it’s about growth.
Before reacting to feedback, ask yourself:
• What could I have done differently?
• Am I really hearing what’s being said?
• How can I act on this constructively?
Pointing the finger inward builds trust and shows that you’re willing to adapt. That’s coachability in action.
Why Coachability Is a Superpower
Coachability isn’t a weakness. It’s the secret sauce for growth.
Listening makes you a better leader, teammate, and founder. It helps you build stronger relationships, create a healthier company culture, and attract smarter people to your team. Investors notice it. Teams respect it. And it’s how businesses grow.
Final Thoughts
You don’t have to be the loudest voice in the room. You don’t have to know it all. But you do have to be willing to learn it all.
Take a page from Steve Jobs’ playbook: slow down, let your words land, and listen more than you speak. Point the finger inward before you point it outward.
Because the best founders aren’t the ones who talk the most—they’re the ones who listen, adapt, and grow. That’s how you win.
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